Longing to return to a previous point.

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Longing to return to a previous point in ones life where pure bliss occupied all the space around you. That’s how I felt today. The minute you cross that door which leads to this feeling, your current issues and complaints that were once blocking your view on life, fall to the ground. While this feeling is amazing, you know that it’s only a moment. You penetrate deeper into this new space and you smile. The smile is not directed toward any individual. It’s a smile representative of the way things used to be. Carefree. A lot easier. Reckless. Your eyes expand and begin to examine everything that has substance. The beautiful young girl at the desk beside you who asked for your ID. You want to say something sweet to her, but this isn’t your space. You feel weird because you know this is all temporary and eventually you will have to venture back to yours. How would two people from two different times connect anyway? She returns your card and this time your smile is specifically for her.

There are people entering your borrowed space. There are also people leaving. This perfect environment has so much life. Perhaps more life than your current life has. It’s like the ocean during a colossal storm. Inside your mind there are a million sparks or flashes of reflection crashing into the rocks of your memory. It’s hard to focus on the present. The present is disappointing compared to now. Structural layouts are still similar to how they were when this was your space. Be that it may some colors are different, former thoughts and emotions are still instantly summoned up. Your nose inhales distant aromas from a time when you didn’t have a care in the world. Times when everything revolved around you. Team me. Too long ago. You continue to explore the space and gaze at how so much has changed, yet so much remains the same. The parts that have not changed give you hope. Change is inevitable, no matter how much we try to push it back.

Interacting with people from this temporary space is the hardest. Small conversations are shared about how things used to be. They explain to you how things are. A deep sigh and a head shake later and you realize how short life really is. Obligated to share a bit of knowledge from a distance place outside of this temporary bliss, you tell the inhabiter to enjoy every moment of ‘now’. You are not the first to share this and the current inhabiters of this space respond accordingly. Time passes and your body begins to tap on the clock. Just like Cinderella, the clock has struck and it’s time to back track your steps and leave the same way you came in. It’s hard to leave. Why leave? Walking down the corridor you can see reality around the corner waiting for your return. Waiting in the same fashion that a parent waits by the door for their child. One last deep breath, smile and head shake and it’s over.

Nostalgia in full effect.

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